In the Eye’s of A Nurse

After a long two back to back twelve hour shifts at the hospital I often find myself looking forward to the long walk of locating my car that is purposefully parked in the furthest parking lot.  This is a time of reflection for me as I enjoy the breaking of the sun over the horizon, the cool air on my face and the sound of my shoes softly hitting the pavement.  It is a time of reflection and peace that is not interrupted with the constant sound of my spectra link (cell phone) that I am forced to carry during work.  Here I am alone with my thoughts asking my self the same question.  “What do I want.”  I simple question that is often met with a layered answer.   Of course there is lots I want but would I truly be happy?  For me as I walk to my car, unlike most people who are in a hurry to get home, I take noticed of the small things.  For example, I noticed colors, shapes, textures and hidden designs.  It is where I find simple beauty.  It becomes my appreciation for being healthy and a live.

Circle of Vines

As I inhale deeply the cold and crisp air morning air, I realize that this my awakening.  My artist is wrestling to put my nurse persona away so my creative side can come out and soak up details that I may use later when sketching.   It is a life line really.  Being a nurse you see a lot of ugliness, sadness, and hostile patients that believe in entitlement to the exclusion of everything else.  The world is ugly. Yet, when I feel the constraints of my job something always happens.  I will cross paths with the one patient that reaches out and touches me.  I will see bravery of those who ask for nothing but are so grateful for a humane touch.  I see beauty in the aging with lines etched in their faces that tell of laughter and happiness.  I see hope, strength, courage flash through my minds eye as I remembered those that have touched me.  So perhaps while I struggle to become an artist, my training is just beginning.  Learning to see human nature at its ugliest and at its most beautiful.  I am in a unique position to portray the human spirit through a nurse’s eyes.  While it is easy for me to see beauty in nature, I am learning to see beauty in humanity.  Perhaps this is my walk in life….

elderly

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