Just a Doodle

Sometimes when things become crazy and you want time to slow down, that is when I pull out my small sketch pad and just start sketching mindlessly.  I never know or plan how these types of sketches turn out, but they are always unique in their design. IMG_20131210_142533The best part, is when my daughter pulls out her sketch pad and sits by me and we come up with ideas together.  I want to make her creative time a place where she can use as an outlet to express herself.

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Earth Fairy

So I ventured into something that I always wanted to play around with. Watercolors. I have always been intimidated by them, yet at the same time I have become bored with just the simple pencil. While I am self-taught, I understand that in order to become good at something you have to just do it. Of course with this being my first piece with watercolors I have learned a lot going through this process. So while facing my fears on the canvas I am gaining insight on how this works. I do know this, while creating I find true happiness and peace. It takes me to a place where there is possibilities without judgment.

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A Little Magic

Have you ever been lost in something such as writing, painting, or other hobbies that you forget about time itself.  In my moments late at night, I was simply enjoying the music pumping through my iPod while engaging the blank piece of paper.  I was free of real life worries or pending issues, it was just  my pencils and I.  The exploration of what can happen always excites me when layout the ground work for an imagine.  Finding a reference for poses is always quite the challenge due to the short list of people who would pose for me so I am left from studying forms from pictures.  It is how I study art.  I appreciate the dances of lines, the subtle touch of shading to bring out the form.  To me its like magic.  Learning to see angles from the positive and negative spaces takes time but allows me to see the simplicity of shapes that come together to form a more complex image.   To me its the dance of lines.  To be the one composing such a dance brings a satisfaction and self worth that I cannot describe.  Its like seeing something about yourself that is pure in away, that sparks something inside your soul that brings about a happiness and peace that can only be found when you accept something that is true about yourself.   When I draw its like a spiritual encounter, the inner voice quiets down and you begin to see in a perspective without judgement.  It is a world that most are uninvited until the finished product is revealed.  But what most don’t know is that it is a true labor of love, the experience of creating is where the magic happens.  The self voyage of discovery.   I stayed up until 2 am working on this one.  It is not finished by any means but I feel the need to post.  After all this little space (blog) is my digital sketch book.  

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Know Thy Self

With the holidays coming to a close, it usually brings a time of self-assessment.  Most people have the usual New Year’s resolutions that typically don’t make it to the end of January.  I am one of those people that pick the traditional pseudo resolutions but I know my heart is not in it.  Yeah I will give it a good try, but that is just it….it’s just a try not a change.  While everyone has their own way, I am finding that for me I want to make a fundamental change. 

In my quest to be more than just a somebody, I want to be the best me I can be.  That starts with knowing yourself.  Life is a journey in which defines who you are, it tells the story of where you have been and predicts where you will end up.  Unfortunately there are some twists and turns that happen but during that time you learn something that you didn’t know about yourself prior to that event.  For me I know that I don’t want to be that person that is constantly going with the crowd.  I want to stop and make my own way which then will define who I know I am in my heart.  This fundamental change will most likely be painful to experience, and such change usually is.  If it where pleasant then it wouldn’t be called a change now would it.  There would be nothing to gain.  So my change I want to go with is learning who I am.  To go against the grain, to challenge myself and brace the impossibilities that I have limited my thinking to be. 

It’s funny, that what I got for Christmas was a beautiful art set with a portable easel that was from my parents and husband.  Do you know that I have a nice easel that sits in the garage that has never been used because I was afraid to try?  Now that I have been pulled back to my sketches, knowing in my heart that this is what brings me joy, I need to make that fundamental change of not being afraid.  With my skills being basic at best, I know that I have potential that is clawing to get out showing me what I really can do with enough guidance and practice.  Self-limiting ideas and people have influenced my decisions in life.  I mean who knows you better than your family or friends.  Not true, and I know this, I have always known this.   You know that sinking feeling when you have made the wrong decisions or that you know you’re going in the wrong direction.  I get that a lot.  I have learned to ignore that inner voice of reason and I have paid the price.   It’s funny to me that when I look around me, sub consciously I have filled my bookshelves with instructional drawing books, famous artists that I admire, and an art desk with tons of mediums to work with empty journals.  I had this for many years.  You would think by looking at my rooms that this is what I do for a living.  I guess it’s time to pay attention and embrace what I have known all along.  Getting back to know the pages of possibilities and to explore a work without limitations.  That is my challenge this year.  Know thy self.

Adoration

Adoration

My attempt to do a mermaid basking in the sunlight.

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Fallen

Fallen

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Back of CD Cover

Back of CD Cover

My example for a cd cover I created.

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